HELEN DEAL CIRCLE OF LIFE CELEBRANT

I'm Helen Deal, a Funeral Celebrant in North London and Suffolk. I capture memories and turn them into a respectful farewell service, whether that's a traditional Funeral, Celebration of Life, a less formal Memorial or Thanksgiving. 

As an Independent Celebrant, I can work at any venue, with any Funeral Director (or none). A ceremony can be non-religious, semi-religious, or include some other spiritual ritual or reference that is meaningful to you. 

Although I'm not personally tied to any belief or set way of doing things, I do believe everyone deserves a thoughtful farewell... with their life story right at the heart. I also believe 'less is more'... so I don't rush around churning out formulaic services or trying to juggle the needs of multiple families at once.

I like to immerse myself fully in each family story, and weave the different strands together as effectively as I can.  (Some lives are 'complicated' - but that's OK, I like a challenge, and luckily my 'Pre-Celebrant' life skills come in handy!) 

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It will be my privilege to help you create a truly reflective end-of-life service - for yourself, if planning ahead, or for a loved family member or friend. The planning process - explained below - will take time and energy, but it will be worth it. 

Types of Funeral 

Times are changing and there are many different ways to say goodbye... 

You may already have some idea of what type of funeral you want? You may already know that an 'Independent Celebrant' - like me - can be more open-minded when it comes to planning your service, compared to a faith leader or 'Humanist'.  

But if this is completely unknown territory to you, don't worry. I can talk you through your service options, be this a Celebration of Life, or any other end-of-life ceremony... Indoors or outdoors - or even at home, or another location of choice? Burial; Cremation - or perhaps a short unattended 'Direct Cremation', without fuss and frills?

Direct Cremation is a new trend that allows you to step away from formality, costly cars or caskets, or the feeling of being on show when you're vulnerable. The practical aspects of death (the committal of the body) happen quietly. A Memorial or Thanksgiving service afterwards allows you more time to get creative or potentially involve more people. 

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Or perhaps you'd like a 'Living Funeral'? The 'pre-funeral' idea started in Japan in the 1990s - you get to be at the centre of your funeral in life, rather than after your death. Importantly,  you get to say what you want to those you care about... and hear their words to you. 

Whatever the type of funeral, we'll focus on the person we are saying goodbye to. We'll acknowledge their highs and lows; laugh, cry, reminisce, and blend in aspects of ceremony that bring comfort to those left behind.  Loss is hard, but it really does help to face that fact communally.   

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How will I plan your funeral service? 

Our first step: getting to know each other, either face-to-face or online. Typically this will take up to two hours. I'll listen for all the little details that will make people smile about the person you're saying goodbye to. We'll talk about their wishes and beliefs, and yours. If helpful, I can give ideas for readings, music, special touches of remembrance.

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​If you have concerns or questions I'll be there for you as much as I can.

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Step two: I have told stories all my professional life. I will use this experience to write a meaningful tribute and structure the service so it flows well. However meandering and informal our chat seemed to be, I will have listened out for small details and the authentic words of family and friends. It's your farewell so it has to feel right for you and an accurate reflection of the deceased. 

If that means going backwards and forwards and re-drafting, that's what I'll do. 

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Step three: when officiating on the day I can lead from the front, or be right behind you giving moral support as you stand to pay tribute. Whatever feels right.​ I'll bring calm, a smile, tissues... and if there's room for humour I'll bring that along too.  

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Choosing the right person to help you is important, so some testimonials from others might bring reassurance. ​

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Eulogy Writing & Funeral Planning 

A life story - a legacy

Everyone has stories worth sharing, as a lasting legacy for their families and a way to leave a mark on the world. That's why a warm and sensitive eulogy is always at the very heart of my ceremonies, not just a religious ritual. 

I also offer a stand-alone service, where I write a bespoke eulogy that can be comfortably delivered by someone else. While it's an honour to be asked to speak about someone's life, perhaps you just haven't the time or confidence to put the words together?  

Or maybe you are planning ahead for your own farewell ceremony?  As well as your life story, we can write down your funeral wishes for your family or solicitor. We can explore ideas for music, readings and rituals that reflect you.

It can feel like a real relief to know your funeral planning is in hand. Certainly the cherished memories you've shared, will one day help in the healing of family and friends.

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Whatever the situation, I will: 

Step one: spend time with you collecting anecdotes, memories and details of the milestones that reflect a life. This will usually be an online conversation of up to two hours. 

Step two: I will write to length and deadline. In my eulogies I always try to preserve the authentic voice of the storyteller and skilfully weave together the different factual elements that make up a life.

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Step three: you'll approve my draft (s) and receive a final copy of my words.  

I'm passionate about preserving social history and leaving a life story as a legacy, so our time together will have felt very rewarding. 

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Please get in touch if you think I can help give a loving send-off for you or your family, or first read more about me to be sure I'm right for you. Costs and details of what's involved can be found under Services.